no focus

I had good intentions, but my A.D.D. and life took over. It has been hard to keep track of what we’ve eaten around here and it’s hard to stay on track, stay focused. A little trip up north happened while the beau had his hip repaired, so whatever I started writing ain’t no more. He ate hospital food, and I ate some of what he had on his plate because what was available in the cafeteria was mostly fried foods. I did eat a plate of ham and beans one night. The foodstamp card does not take care of things like that. Fortunately the things that I had purchased prior to leaving before we were prepared were still OK in the fridge when we came back. Also, while we were gone, a friend had a Mardi Gras party and we were fortunate to be on the receiving end the next day…we got a pan of beans and rice, yeah. I promptly put it in serving sizes for the beau and put it away in the freezer, I can’t eat it because of reflux. He just wanted hot sauce to add to it. Our dietary preferences are wide set.

There was a story in the paper this week about people eating mud cookies, but the dirt now costs them $5, which is too expensive for them. Nothing like a little perspective, eh? I remember my brother eating dirt and dog food, but it wasn’t something we were fed, or had to eat because we had nothing else. We are quite fortunate in this country, aren’t we? I certainly feel fortunate to have foodstamps while we are both unable to work. I have my moments when I think, I could work today…and then it rains and I swoon, or I fall over two or three times (because of my vestibular problem). I am not on disability, so I have no income, though I have been like this more than a year. I didn’t want to take advantage of the system…it’s not like I had little ones in the house (except the animals). The only reason we asked for assistance was because neither of us can work now, at all, something we never could imagine at this stage of the game.  After a couple of months with no income, I feel fortunate to be able to buy a roast and potatoes and carrots and make a meal that lasts us for three or four days. I spent $44 at the store two days ago, and I can stretch it fairly well for now.

I do what I can to make sure the old man is getting protein and vitamins since he needs to rebuild his bones. It is the lack of a good diet, smoking, drinking and caffeine that has broken his bones out from under him. A lot of people try to survive on that and worse. The doctor said he has the bones of an 80 year old woman. Uh,  he is not even 45. He has tried to live with so little for so long. He was wasting when I met him a couple of years ago, and I have done what I could to get his diet under control. The damage was done long ago. Of course now, not smoking, drinking or using caffeine does cut a lot out of the budget, especially since foodstamps wouldn’t cover those things anyway, but mostly it’s leaving room for more healthful things to eat and drink. I try to give him juice now and then, and he needs milk, but milk at almost $4.00 a gallon is hard to manage.

I just hope for the best each day and try to keep a perspective. I have a friend who lives on protein bars and nuts. She is happy with that, and the occasional Chinese dinner splurge. People can and do survive on less.

We are also fortunate to have someone who sent us some things to help the beau get back on track, some cod liver oil, fish oil, calcium tablets, and an osteo-density supplement, also something not on the foodstamp list, it’s not food. At some point he’ll need a bone scan to see if other bones may disintegrate like this hip did. Whatever we can do now, while others are willing to assist, will help him in the long run. Sometimes ya just gotta deal with what you get, and keep moving. It could always be worse.